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Not just for me. That was the last feeling I got from him. It was hard
for him, too, but he found a way to do it go back to where he came
from. You know why he poked through in the first place? Because he
was lonely. He just wanted some company because he didn't know
what to do with all of himself. I mean, like, if you were twelve percent
of all the matter in the universe and you were stuck over in some
foreign dimension, wouldn't you wonder what it was like where you
came from?"
"Heavy," Seeth murmured, nodding agreement.
"He finally decided, when I talked to him about it, that maybe he's not
on, like, the same wavelength as this dimension anymore. Like people
preferring Nikes to Converse, you know?"
"What is she talking about?" Brittle asked.
"Footgear," Kerwin told him.
It was the Halets' turn to look confused.
Miranda went on. "I tried to convince him that if he stuck around and
kept sneezing or burping or whatever it was he was doing that he was
going to do a lot of damage and hurt a lot of innocent thinking beings.
So he managed to squeeze himself back through the crack and seal it
up behind him."
"You did well," Rizz told her solemnly. "The whole universe owes you
an unpayable debt."
She shrugged. "Hey, like, no big deal, you know?"
"Where are we?" Kerwin asked. "It felt like we moved again."
"We skipped across a considerable distance just as Izmir returned to
his proper dimension, because we feared possible side effects," Brittle
told him. "We're in a section of space your people call actually I don't
believe they have a name for it. We left behind a few new quasars that
are going to puzzle your astronomers no end when they locate them.
They won't display a normal red shift. You can tell them they're the
result of Izmir's homeward journey. There's also a unique supermass
whose driving mechanism they won't be able to explain. That's what
you get when you seal spacetime."
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"Yeah, right, we'll tell 'em all about it," said Seeth impatiently. "Does
this mean we go home?"
"Poor Izmir," Miranda was saying. "He was so alone. But I think he
understood."
"He must have," said Odenaw, "or he wouldn't have gone. Maybe he
can project his consciousness through without intruding mass. Sort of
make some mental visits."
"Oh no," she told the Halet. "He can't do that because he doesn't exist
anymore."
Everyone stared at her. "I mean, like, the consequences must be
obvious to everybody. When he snapped back into the seventh
dimension he, like, folded into himself. All that mass just overloaded.
There was, you know, a big explosion. A big bang, I think they call it.
Anyway, the seventh dimension isn't empty anymore. It's all full of
Izmir." She looked thoughtful. "You think, like, maybe this dimension
was empty at one time, except for something like Izmir that got bored
with being all alone and decided to fold in on itself and blew up to form
everything else?"
"No telling," said Rizz quietly. "I don't believe anyone's ever seriously
proposed a theory that the universe was born out of suicidal
loneliness."
"Why not, Jack?" said Seeth. "Why shouldn't mass need a psychiatrist
like everybody else? I mean, existence is nuts anyway."
"Much to ponder," said Brittle. "For now there remains the much
smaller question of how best to get you home. We cannot do it
ourselves. Even our screened presence would register a little too
strongly on your people's detection devices. However, we can return
you to the vessel you last traveled."
"Ganun won't understand, but he'll go along," said Rail. He smiled at
his human friends, all three eyes blinking simultaneously. "I'm sure
he'll be able to slip you home quietly."
"What about the Isotat and the Sikan?" Kerwin wondered.
"Both will continue to search the region we left in haste. Finding
nothing but undisciplined, raw energy, the Isotat will return to their
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travels. Their chance of securing an ultimate weapon gone, the Sikan
will start on the long journey back to their home galaxy. There is no
reason to pursue conflict when the cause has absented itself. Only you
humans do that."
*14*
Ganun and the rest of his people were too shocked by the sudden
appearance of their missing guests in their midst to object to the
fantastic tale they had to tell. There was a lot of whispering and
sideways glances before the crew returned to their duties.
As a guest himself, Yirunta was able to spend more time with his
distant cousins than any member of the regular crew. The Neanderthal
leaned back in the lounge in the common room and regarded them
thoughtfully.
"So the universe exists as the result of suicidal loneliness?"
"Maybe," Kerwin replied. "That's a theory of Miranda's. It may all be
just a big joke."
Seeth burst into the common room. He was cradling his petal
instrument. Several off-duty crew members crowded close behind him.
Kerwin glimpsed other alien shapes in their huge, hairy hands.
"Hey, give Mom a hug for me, big brother, and Dad too, if he'll take it.
I'm not going home."
Kerwin gaped at him. "What are you talking about?"
The off-duty crew members pushed into the room. "I've been rappin'
with some of the guys, see? They're all amateurs like myself. We've
been jamming and talking and they like my stuff. Say it's just primitive
enough to catch on big back on House. Bimuri here says he thinks he
can line us up some good gigs in a city called Asaria."
The tallest of the new arrivals nodded. "Big money for sure."
"You can't do that!" Kerwin yelped. "What are your friends going to
say?"
"Hey, I'm independent, man. If I drop out of sight and show up again
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in ten years, the most anybody's gonna say to me is 'Hi, Seeth, what's
happenin', man?' I'll just tell 'em me and my band's been touring,
which'll be the truth. The boys assure me there are ways to work a
little Earthside visit now and then without upsetting the cops." He was
grinning hugely. "Told you I was due for a real break. I'm not gonna
blow it."
"A star is born," Kerwin muttered. "Swell. Go on, if you want to. Me,
I've got a test to make up."
"Hey, no sweat. Just tell the profs what you've been doing."
"Sure."
"Goodness knows you must have stories to tell," said Yirunta. "All this
talk of Sikan and Isotat and crossing intergalactic gulfs and these
mysterious Halet is a bit much to believe. Yet the danger is past. Our
instruments find no trace of the field Izmir put out. Even Ganun has
accepted the gist of your tale, if not the details."
"It doesn't matter," said Rail. "As for myself, I am resigning my post
as espial and going into interior decorating. I've had enough."
Kerwin looked across the room. "What about you, Miranda? You just
saved the entire universe. You must be worn out. I don't guess you're
free Saturday night?"
"Sorry."
"Sunday?"
"Can't make it, like."
"Next Saturday?" It occurred to Kerwin that he was begging, but he
didn't care.
"Well I'll have to check my book, you know? Maybe."
Maybe. Kerwin felt better than he had at any time since he and Seeth
had been watching Rail bowling back in Albuquerque. That was a long,
long time ago.
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